2018: Taking stock, and looking ahead...

What a year - another year - of whiplash in politics and news, with Trump being the stirrer of the pot. The idiot continues to tear down and weaken the civil government structure, with the rapid-fire hiring and firing of his cabinet members. If Trump has an ounce of shame left, if he ever has enough attention span to finish reading even a short news article other than Fox News, if he realizes how POORLY he has been doing the job as compared to past administrations, he should be feeling the full weight of it. Sadly, this is not a man who would ever admit to wrongdoing. So, he marches on, and drags everyone along with it.

And then there was the turmoil in the legislative branch, in the form of 2018 midterms, flipping control of the House to the Democrats, a change that has not been seen for decades. Democrats must be all giddy, touting the Blue Wave banner. While the House flips to Dems more readily, it lost the Senate, though arguably on small margin. To me, the midterms results were really more a rebuff of Trump, rather than an affirmation to Dems policy. Yes, there are some minority (including women) joining the House ranks, these shiny new objects have to prove their worth over time, as McCaskill has rightly pointed out. The jury is still out, and I'm sitting on the fence to see how cheap talks are put into action.

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Politics aside, economy is on a roller-coaster ride. There's back-and-forth in the trade war between US and China. There is no doubt that pains will be felt on both sides, though it's more rhetoric from China since it exports more, far more, to US, than the other way around; hence, China has far more to lose. Its market is big, thanks to its huge population, but individual purchasing power of its consumers is still far far lower than those in US. The Chinese can turn on a dime to shrink its consumption, should time get worse, though one would hardly see that reflected in the official China news outlets that churn out only good news.

China does have one upper hand. Its US imports of mostly agricultural products are mainly in Red States, thus a sharp cutback in US imports is going to hurt those core Trump supporters most. How far these agri-states can hold out before suffering permanent damages (and switches allegiance politically), and how readily China can find their agri-supply from some other countries, remain to be seen. 2019 is going to be the year to see that play out.

When the economy (and stock market) got a boost from the unnecessary tax cuts, Trump took full credit for it. When the Fed decides to tamper down inflation potential by steadily raising rates, Trump threatens to fire the Fed Chair, who was installed there by Trump himself. Arguably the only ones right now that are untouchables, is the Supreme Court. Without the power to fire Supreme Court judges, Trump decides to disparage and discredit it instead, weakening the beacon of independence in judiciary that has been holding up, in face of all the turmoil in the executive branch. It's a total disgrace.

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With Trump's propensity to deliver high drama, his latest attempt is the government shutdown. As Dems are taking control of the House, come January, it's moment of truth to see if Dems really have the spine to go toe-to-toe with Trump over the funding of the border wall. The thing of interest is, Trump has upended the playbook about the whole hoopla of "government shutdown." In generations past, everyone tried to play nice and avoid being seen as the "bad guy" who brought about a government shutdown or impasse, Trump instead invites that. He wants to be seen as confrontational. If he can't fire Supreme Court, if he can't get rid of main media, he can always bully the Congress.

Personally I don't give a damn about the border wall. The idea of it, is not really an issue; afterall, it's absurd for Dems to play contrarian and insist on open border. But the reality and logistics (including maintenance) of it, is a total nightmare. As technology comes of it, why don't we deploy drones to do more of the work than building a physical wall?

I empathize with those who want to make a better life for themselves and their kids, but if you ask me, I cannot say too much positive things about this migrant caravan. Does a country have right to accept or deny entry into its borders? Yes. Do migrants from other countries have a right to demand entry and same treatment as its own citizens? No. These migrants, under the encouragements of activists, decide that as long as they come in bigger numbers, bring more small children along, then they would be treated preferentially. I'm sorry to say, but that rubs me the wrong way.

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Although the execution of Trump's administration in this regard is haphazard, I do not disagree with it on principles. And for Dems to demand White House taking in anyone and everyone who cares to join the migrant caravan, it's just plain stupid. One does not have to look any further than to see what the consequences of that kind of open-border policy would be like, than to see turmoil in Europe, following the migrant crisis. Thanks to that, Angela Merkel is going out of power, after suffering defeats after defeats in ballot box. Big hearts and noble cause notwithstanding, the execution of it, is remarkably poor.

There can be no doubt that whoever comes next after Merkel is going to be far more hardline to refugees. But if Macron thinks he can assume the EU leadership in its void, he's seriously mistaken. France has been treading water economically for decades now. The latest yellow vests riots only serve to highlight how unpopular he really is, and how unwilling the French people would accept any level of "suffering." His idea of having a true European army, in the retreat of US from NATO, will be more rhetoric than anything else. Afterall, where was France's resistance during Hitler's rise and advance in WWII? To me, the French are always a bunch of good time charlies.

As to Brexit, all the Armageddon of economic collapse and chaos predicted after the referendum was passed two years ago never came to pass. As it turned out, it's all just cheap, scary talks. As the UK PM is pushing to finalize the Brexit agreement, the only bullet left to scare the UK voters shitless, is the border between Ireland and Northern Ireland. Not that it's unimportant, but it's hardly something that should have make-or-break a referendum as crucial as Brexit. Yet, there is talks again proposing re-doing the referendum, or scuttle the deal that the PM has put together (which is lame, yes, but it's not as disastrous as the Labor or EU has labeled it). These anti-Brexiteers should be ashamed of themselves.

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With all the domestic flashes, foreign policy issues became almost an afterthought. Important issues like US relocating its embassy to Jerusalem, US withdrawal of troops from Syria thereby handing over the Kurds (the erstwhile ally in the critical fight to beat back ISIS) to Turkey, the on-again-off-again talk with North Korea, the real threat of Russia now that Putin has become Trump's BFF, on and on, they all got pushed almost to the backburner, all thanks to Trump. This is a guy that has no moral, no principle, no ideology, no brain, a summarily petty guy who only seeks to make a point that he's the loudest guy in the room, so long as it keeps the spotlight on himself. Case in point: Trump didn't even realize the major rebuke from Jim Mattis' resignation letter, thus praising him initially, then turning around to firing him two months ahead of schedule when he finally got the meaning of what Mattis' resignation is and how much more attention and praises Mattis garners.

Things like this, give me a chuckle, though it's no laughing matter. If no capable and moral people is willing to work for the government, then all that are left, are scoundrels and con-men like Trump himself. For chrissake, there's still two more years left until 2020. In these past two years, Trump has already wrecked such damages to the country, both domestically and internationally, what would become of it in another two years? It's a scary thought indeed.

But, it is news like that that turn me off so completely that I don't even bother much follow everything so closely. What's news anyways, but more drama, more self-dealings exposed, more fake news identified (and then retweeted some more). Our life has to go on, one way or the other. I refuse to have my life be ruined by the day-to-day high drama.

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On a personal front, there are increasingly days when I consider about early retirement. I've planned sufficiently over the years precisely for this occasion. The kids are going to college, and things are taking shape. I don't necessarily have to kill myself for financial gains. Plus, I must be getting older. I'm finding myself increasingly reminiscing the past, rather than looking forward to the future, as I'm getting ready to pass the torch to the next generations. 

What I'm not sure of though, is what to do after retirement from my current career. I need to actively look for a second act, some outside interests that would sustain me and keep my mind active. I still have much energy, but I don't feel like tolling over making my employers wealthier. There must be something more worthwhile in life than that....

Time to seek and find, in 2019.

On "lean in" and the false promise to "have it all"...

There are certain unspoken expectations of women in our society. Women are supposed to be supportive of other women. It's supposed to be a sisterhood. We're not supposed to speak ill of other women. In a male-dominated career, women are particularly expected to stand by each other, no matter what. To do otherwise, to think otherwise, is almost unthinkable.

I don't generally think of my colleagues along gender lines. Maybe I've been incredibly lucky to have colleagues throughout the years who are always professional, courteous, genteel, collegiate...well, except a small handful of unpleasant ones. In general, men and women alike, they have been good co-workers.

I'm forever grateful to have a spouse who is supportive of me, my career choice, a new-age man who takes more than his fair share of household chores and child-rearing duties, thereby allowing me the flexibility and energy to stay on the career path without having ever to consider stepping off to start a family. I never have to even ask, and he'll take his own initiatives.

I've always been the outspoken kind, never shy about expressing opinions. I don't take shit, I don't suffer fools, and can just as easily and readily jab others with jest. When I see an opportunity, I would not hesitate to take it. (Talking about snap judgment.) Over the years, that kind of almost fearlessness has served me well.

As I get older, I'm more aware of other people outside of my own bubbles. I have not realized how incredibly blessed I have been, having a supportive spouse and family, all those around me - particularly the kids - are healthy, even just having someone who is willing to take a chance on me over the years in career. I've taken so much for granted, I have not noticed there are many people who would never have that kind of luck and blessings.

(I mention luck because, let's face it, I can be clever and I'm hardworking, but I don't think I'm super-smart. There are many more people who work much harder than I do. I don't think I would achieve what I have so far, even by the sheer luck of being at the right place, at the right time.)

Why all these introspection? Well, it all started with the Lean In book that came out in 2013. It's much hyped when it came out. At one point, I checked it out to see what all the fuss is about. I find the book so irritating and passive-aggressive, I couldn't make myself finish it. I do have to give it credit that it's not as irritating as that Tiger Mom book which is so freaking off-putting, I couldn't make myself to finish even half of it.

What are some of the choice words for these books by these women? Condescending, patronizing, passive-aggressive, narcissistic.

What's the purpose of the Tiger Mom book but for the author to self-congratulate herself to have succeeded in squeezing her daughter into Harvard, having gone through constant fights and struggles to hover - well, this is a huge understatement - over kids. To hear her tell it, it's childrearing, sprinkled with references to her fine lineage (even a fine nose, no less!) to reminder readers that she herself is a good-looking woman.

And then there is Lean In. The supposed self-help book to "teach" other women how to improve themselves in order to move ahead in career. Hey, it's not hard, all you have to do, is to lean in. What the author conveniently leaves out from the pages, is the money she has in the bank, and already high-paying jobs that both she and her then-husband have had, that she can have all the hired hands she needs in order to continue pursuing her career, and of course the luck of men giving her a break (Larry Summers, Mark Zuckerberg, to name the most notable ones).

These bone-headed female (I won't call it feminist) advice is not unlike the almost bragging of Marissa Mayer who talked of her going back to work shortly after childbirth (as if any women who consider not doing that, is self-sabotaging their own career or is not committed enough as the next guy over the cubicle).

What they have not realized, is the pampered bubble that they have created for themselves. By instructing other (young) women to lean in more, the message from Sheryl Sandberg is, "you are not leaning in enough as I do."  If you're not as successful or rich as she is now, it must be that you're not doing enough, or rather, not doing as well as I do, or worse yet, you're simply not good enough. The real message is really "look at how successful I am, and how well I'm doing."

Which is why Michelle Obama's new book and interviews are such a breath of fresh air. Instead of "look at my success" (as Sandberg and Chua and Mayer did), Obama empathizes with others by sharing her struggles. By simply acknowledging “It’s not always enough to lean in because that shit doesn’t work all the time,” that's exactly how all other women feel, me included.

And to hear Michelle Obama shatters that myth that women can have it all, that's really priceless. Why? Because we first have to acknowledge a problem before we can try to fix something. Women like Sandberg think they have it all figured out, is clueless without even realizing it. If a system is stacked up against you, your chance of success is infinitesimally small.

In a way, even if my life so far has had an almost mirrored shadow of Lean In, I refuse to pigeon myself as such. I would never in a million years lecture other women that my way is the shiny path to glory and success.